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18-Apr-2016 00:47

I'd taken a break from dating after a quick but hot liaison with a punk I'd met at a Damned concert petered out, but I wanted to, you know, put the vibes out there into the universe.As I waded through Ok Cupid's endless questions and block of text, I imagined the countless men of New York City setting their age filters to 35 or, gasp, 39, and I wondered if it was true that anyone who didn't accept me as I am isn't worth knowing.When I was younger, I saw the girls (and the guys, for that matter) my age to be kids, which I was too.Older women were how I escaped that feeling."Michael isn't alone in his desires though they're not always reciprocated."I'd call it a slow attrition of diminishing returns," Chelsea said about dating in NYC."I feel as if I make out with a guy and tell a guy I'd like to enjoy sexual congress, he should be stoked.There has been no shortage of men under 39 sending me messages and little "likes" through the ether.And while they're not all necessarily piquing my interest, they're also not the horrible fuckboys whose janky messages and blurry cock shots you see screenshotted on Tumblr and Instagram.

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(And love, ideally.) If it weren't for the algorithms, I could meet all of these people IRL and they wouldn't know I was 40 unless I showed them my birth certificate — ah, the very idea made me irate.

Luckily, OKCupid's data is much more optimistic than my friend Chelsea.